What’s holding you back?

5 min read

// What you don’t know?

I can sell.

It’s a bold statement but it’s what’s got me to where I am right now in my career, I can bloody sell. I love the phrase “Selling is just the exchange of value for money” because you have to make something appear valuable and then get an exchange for money in return. I’ve always had an eye for what I can say, do or how I can act in order to make something look and feel valuable and the rest is just practice.

It would allow me to build a company up from humble beginnings and move the needle in ways which generate cash - sales is the lifeblood of every industry and every company - people who are good at it should be seen as valuable commodities.

But put me into a different role, finance for example and I’m like a fish out of water.

Throughout my career, I’ve toyed with the idea of learning how profit and loss in a company is calculated, how margin on a larger scale works and how overheads actually fit into a business plan but I never took the leap.

The thing is, if you want to run your own business or be promoted into a position which requires you to know the basics of an area that you’re not comfortable with then you need to know. When you don’t know something or you’re good at delegating (as I am too) then you’re often able to shift the responsibility over to someone who does know what they’re doing and then you don’t need to do it.

The problem is - I avoided an area of my life which would have excelled my knowledge and this has meant that I have been prevented from really growing my knowledge.

It’s a bold admission but I am now able to see what I don’t know which is allowing me to share this with you - the thing is, it takes guts to admit that actually, you’re not that knowledgeable in an area and then it’s even harder still to begin to address that fear.

// Why not commit to learning?

The problem with finance, proper camera settings, proper skateboarding (instead of electric skateboarding), Adobe Illustrator and all the other things which I know I want to learn about but never do is just that, I have to learn about them.

Firstly, there is the time it takes to learn a new skill - the research (by which I mean finding the best Youtube video to learn from) and then the practice. The time to practice and practice until the desired skill is at the right level - that level which I am comfortable with. I don’t want to learn how to dial in ISO settings, adjust exposure and learn about focal lengths when I can just allow my iPhone to do all the things I need and save a ton of time.

The same goes for that dreaded finance thing - I was able to get by because I had someone else to do it for me but when I had to learn it, I dived right in. But I didn't want to.

And that brings me onto the second point - convenience.

I was able to avoid doing finance, I’m able to avoid learning camera settings and I definitely don’t need to learn how to ride a proper skateboard because conveniently, I have an electric one.

We all want to avoid hard work in some way or another and its only when we’re forced into a position of necessity that we actually pick up the mantle and run with it.

// The fear of change.

Making mistakes is an important part of learning - the repeated exposure to those mistakes builds resilience and experience. But what if we haven’t got the mental headspace to make those mistakes?

What do I mean? I’m talking about the self confidence to pick up a new thing and play with it - without the fear of judgement or the fear of failure.

When you have confidence in a task (because you’ve done it plenty of times) then you have very little anxiety over doing it and therefore, it’s a mental bias to stick to your comfort zone. Basically, I’m saying I like doing things I know about and I don’t like doing things I don’t know about.

Personally, I have very little fear of actually ‘doing’ a new task but I do have a comfort zone bias towards sticking in my lane.

I don’t fear a task because of the task, I fear a task because I don’t like straying from things that I don’t understand/know about.

Does that make sense to you?

It’s the complete opposite of a bungy jump where I would be scared of the actual task but not that fearful of saying “I’d do that”.

You belief in your capabilities influences the choices you make, the effort you put into tasks, your perseverance in the face of difficulties, and your resilience in the pursuit of goals.

If you want to do it, you don’t mind the failure.

//Perfectionism

My final hurdle is perfectionism.

I’ve spoken about this before but I hate not being able to do things to a standard which is in my mind - I want things to be perfect.

(Check out this blog post where I talk about this)

I want my vlogs to be perfect, I want my designs to be perfect, I want my creative pursuits to align with a specific image - you can tell me for forever and a day that perfection is in the eye of the beholder but I am also the worst for wanting things to be a certain way.

I love putting out my work and my creative ideas but the barrier of an unrealistically high standard I set is what stops me.

Perfectionism doesn’t stop me from trying new things but it does stop me from displaying that work - I like doing things I’m good at.

The fear of not meeting my high standards paralyzes me.

// In Conclusion

Selling, the art of value exchange, propelled me into the position I am today but I think I could have got here faster, sooner and earning probably more money if I had addressed the knowledge gap - a reluctance to explore finance held me back.

Admitting this takes guts, exposing what I've sidestepped for an ‘easy life’ but I want you to take away that fear hampers growth. I've recognized the need to confront this fear, which should be a vital step.

Resistance to learning stems from challenges - the time for research and practice. Convenience gets in the way, offering shortcuts but preventing deep understanding of topic.

Another hurdle is the fear of change, discomfort from making those dreaded mistakes.

Confidence in familiar tasks breeds a bias in us because I’ve found that actually, it's not the task, but the unfamiliarity outside my expertise which I’’m fearful of.

Perfectionism is the final hurdle - my own unrealistically high standards. While it doesn't deter trying new things, it obstructs showcasing work.

Fear of falling short paralyzes me.

It's about recognizing what we don't know, confronting fears that means we don’t hold ourselves back.